Three Questions for Success

That is the last question the folks at the Rational Reminder podcast all their guests. William Bengen (episode 135) had an interesting and applicable answer to this question. He said that he asks himself the following three questions before going to bed each night.

1. Today, did I learn anything new or did I create something?
2. Did I do anything to help anybody?
3. Have I given proper attention to the mystery and wonder of the experience of being alive?

These questions resonated for a few reasons. First, it takes less than a minute to do each night. There is really no reason why you couldn’t make this habit. Second, the questions do align very well with what I am trying to do with my time on this planet. Learning and creating content is very meaningful to me. Acts of service are even more meaningful in the long term. The first two questions reflect the needed balance between independence and interdependence. The dance between self-actualization and self-transcendence. Lastly, the third question reminds me to slow down and enjoy the ride. What is the point of checking the first two boxes if you are mindlessly going through life?

Here a some common examples of activities from my life that count toward each question.

1. Learn or Create
   • Read
   • Write
   • Record Videos
   • Program
2. Help
   • Good conversations. Ask insightful questions.
   • Good deeds (stranger)
   • Small acts of kindness (partner)
   • Volunteer/coach
   • Teach
   • YouTube/Blog (help others with free content)
3. Attention
   • Meditate
   • Journal
   • Play with animals/kids
   • Listen to music
   • Go for a walk in silence
   • Spend time in nature

I have been tracking my answers to these questions using the Daylio app for a few months now. There is definitely a correlation between my mood and the number of checkmarks I get in each question. The direction of causality is still unclear. Does paying attention to life make me happier or is it the other way around? Can it be that I slow it down once I am happy? Maybe a future article will explore these questions by looking back on years worth of data.

These questions serve as a daily reminder for what really matters. They also help to set the bar low enough to be satisfied with your days. You can spend your days running around without checking off the big boxes. Conversely, I often check off all three boxes when I take a personal day. I have also found the habit of paying yourself first with the first hour of your day to be a good time for the activities listed above. William Bengen’s questions for success also remind me of a quote from Derek Sivers.

Affiliate Links

• Transcend – Scott Barry Kaufman
• The Wealthy Barber – David Chilton
• Anything You Want – Derek Sivers